Posted by
AmeriDan on Friday, October 20, 2006 6:25:00 PM
It's almost decision time.
I am starving and must eat. I feel if I miss another meal, I will waste away. Like President Reagan once said, alot of Americans will go to bed hungry tonight; then he mentioned diets or something.
Since the Democrats aren't in control of both houses of Congress...yet, and therefore can't fill my refrigerator with food...yet. I am down to two choices.
Cat food, or peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. It seems my decision not to stop at the store this morning was wrong. And yet, I'm being punished for that, when it should be celebrated and rewarded. I had the intention, just not the energy.
I like PB&J sandwiches, but they have their downside. You have to get a plate (or paper towel, if you're single like me), and a knife, and the PB. Then the jelly. Don't get me started on the bread tearing apart during the critical spreading phase. To my knowledge, President Bush has never addressed this issue. Where's John Kerry and his 20/20 hindsight when you need him?
Thankfully, the cat food is delicious. I haven't tried it yet, but it's chicken tenders from Flo's Cafe. Yes, there is really a Flo's Cafe where I live. Great food. I had two dinners delivered yesterday, I had the catfish last night. The chicken was for today. But despite my best intentions, I never stopped at the grocery store to get the cheaper chicken tenders for the AmeriStrayCats.
They are out there right now. Waiting for me.
Four cat faces pressed against my patio door. Wanting what they feel they are entitled to. Their basic right for chicken tenders, torn into bite size pieces. Worst part is, they don't like PB&J. They want chicken.
So now is the time to make my decision. Cat food or PB&J? Where's the Democrat's with a plan when you need then! Whatever I decide, I'm sure they'll come along with a better plan. After the fact.
UPDATE: Karl Rove has just emailed me, and suggest that I give the chicken to the cats, and order another dinner from Flo's. BUT: he recommended the "Flo's Famous Country Fried Steak", when I'm clearly in the mood for chicken. A perfect example of his not being in the mainstream. I guess that whole spying on U.S. citizens isn't working out so well after all.
UPDATE: John Kerry has just emailed. He reports that this would not have happened if he were President, and that he has a plan for just this type of situation.
UPDATE: President Bush has joined in! He says... What's wrong with PB&J for tonight? Have that, and stop by Flo's tomorrow for breakfast. Pick up some cheap chicken tenders on the way back home for the AmeriStrayCats.
UPDATE: MMmmm, I had forgotten how good peanut butter and jelly sandwiches taste. Thanks President Bush!
-AmeriDan (10/20/06 7pm)
Note: I'm thankful that I don't have anymore big decisions or choices coming up any time soon. Like, say November 7th. I know where I'll be and what I'll be doing.